Most Oak Parkers have aced the latest pedestrian dance. But in order to promenade smoothly along the sidewalks, here’s the Top 10 rules:

1. Kindergartners holding hands, walking two-by-two, get preferential sidewalk space. If they’re coming toward you, make a Dos-à-dos and throw a wave to these precious little peeps and their teachers who so diligently wear their masks.

2. People on crutches. Even if you feel a sense of ownership for your bit of pavement, Grapevine swiftly to the side and remember how difficult it was when you sprained your ankle.

3. Dogs. Is the dog disciplined with four paws in coordinated alignment, or is it pulling on the leash? In any event, Waltz lightly toward the road and call out, “Good Dog,” by way of encouragement.

4. Bicycles. If the person is 15 years or older, they should really be on the street, but sometimes a person is scared of bicycling in traffic. In which case why not do the Moonwalk and keep that critical scowl under your mask. 

5. People carrying heavy shopping bags. They’ve already made a ton of decisions: Organic, lactose, gluten? Give them a break Chasse off to the side and be thankful you don’t have their groceries to put away.

6. Three or more in a bunch. If you’re a single, Pasodoble onto the grass and puff out your chest to show you’re not intimidated.

7. You’re on the block when a newcomer approaches out of the blue. Technically, you could have a stand-off — you were there first. But why upset yourself? Make a Cross Body Lead and give up the real estate.

8. You’re in a bad mood. Do a Thunderclap which incorporates clapping in the air with a sliding motion. What the heck — it can’t hurt, and you may feel better.

9. Parent with stroller. Do a Pirouette and be happy you don’t have a baby to nurture through this pandemic!

10. Busy sidewalk. Salsa across the road. It’s lovely to see people out and about, but until we’re all safe let’s not step on each other’s toes. 

Val Gee 

Oak Park

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