While people were yelling at each other in Oak Park Village Hall last Tuesday night during the village board meeting, an audience in Lund Auditorium at Dominican University were treated to a clinic on civil discourse titled, “Two Dads Defending Democracy,” sponsored by Growing Community Media and moderated by Sheila Solomon, a member of GCM’s board of directors, who brought her calm demeanor to the proceedings, just in case it got out of hand.
It did not get out of hand, though the two dads come from opposite sides of the political spectrum, and even though Joe Walsh, a past Republican congressman from Illinois, is a former (self-described) “Tea Party banger,” while Fred Guttenberg has been a dedicated gun safety advocate ever since his daughter was murdered during a mass shooting at her high school in Parkland, Florida in 2018.
One could be forgiven for wondering how civil dialogue is possible with such a pairing. For several years, they yelled at each other on social media, defending their respective positions on gun violence and other matters, until Walsh, a “proud man of the right,” got tired of being, as he puts it, “a divisive asshole,” and reached out to several members of the political left, inviting them to engage in a more civil conversation. Most, he says, flipped him off. Guttenberg was the only one who said yes. Despite disagreeing with him on “almost everything,” Walsh says he respected Guttenberg for being willing to get involved politically after his daughter died. “We hated on each other, but we didn’t hate each other,” he recalls. Guttenberg says he learned, “We can disagree and still communicate.”
A wary friendship ensued. It’s not all sweetness and light. “We get into it,” Guttenberg says. But they also get along. With a critical election approaching, the two dads decided to take their dialogue on the road because they found common ground in their mutual distaste for Donald Trump and their shared assessment that our democracy would not survive his return to the White House.
Walsh is a showboat, gesturing grandly to amplify his points. He spends half the evening with his hand on Guttenberg’s shoulder, signaling when he just has to say something in response. He is not everyone’s cup of tea (so to speak).
But he passed all of my litmus tests:
Walsh voted for Trump in 2016, realized his mistake and is doing something about it. He voted for Biden in 2020, does not buy the Big Lie, and is actively working to stop Trump from winning in 2024. That’s what this road show is about.
He was the one who reached out first to begin the dialogue.
He acknowledges that the Tea Party (2010) paved the way for Trump (2016) and apologizes for it.
He says defending democracy is more important than defending ideology. He puts country before party.
As a 2nd Amendment supporter, he nonetheless backs gun safety measures, including universal background checks, red flag laws, secure gun storage, etc., and he even signed a letter based on principles proposed by Guttenberg, asking gun owners to support gun safety legislation.
And he has been willing to endure the predictable withering backlash from his fellow conservatives for daring to step out of line.
Any conservative who can do all that scores big points in my book, even though I disagree with his positions on specific issues (such as his reluctance to support an assault weapons ban). Walsh says he defends the right to bear arms. Guttenberg retorts, “And I defend your right to be free from gun violence.”
Guttenberg doesn’t believe that, between now and November, Trump supporters can be reached. Walsh, however, is an optimist who believes everyone is reachable (“except for Tucker Carlson,” he admits).
Our long-term problem Guttenberg says, is “pernicious polarization.” Walsh acknowledges that the MAGA movement is further down the road of “hating who we disagree with.” In fact, MAGAs are energized by polarization, he notes, but we shouldn’t kid ourselves. “All of us are on that road.”
Guttenberg agrees, “We need to renew our social contract.”
First, however, Trump must be stopped. And we do that by voting, Guttenberg says, challenging those on the anti-Trump side who are holding out for some “ideal” candidate. “If you need to fall in love, there are dating apps for that.” In the meantime, he says, “You know who to vote for.”
Walsh, on the other hand, aims his challenge at Gen Zs, who are pessimistic about their future and ask why they should care if democracy survives. “People are afraid, so they check out,” he says, then points to Guttenberg. “This man’s daughter was murdered. He could have checked out and said nothing will ever change. Instead, he got involved. If he didn’t check out, you can’t either.”
Fred Guttenberg and Joe Walsh are traveling this divided country, demonstrating what is possible. They say we need to vote against Donald Trump, the biggest threat to our democracy, and vote for Joe Biden, the only person who can defeat him.
If the center right and center left can find common cause — and these two dads are proving it’s possible — then what’s stopping the rest of us?
