I’ll probably have a very nice Christmas, with family and friends and music and laughter, despite the country’s lurching from crisis to crisis.
I’ll self-soothe by watching A Christmas Story more than once. I particularly love the “old man” constantly doing battle with the furnace. (Does anybody else remember clinkers?) He feels inexplicable joy over the leg lamp, which I think is his unconscious self-soothing. Deep down he knows the dogs will get the turkey.
His actions are sort of mystical, really, and wonderful. He’s asserting himself in ways that please him and don’t harm anyone else. He even buys his son a BB gun against his wife’s wishes — not safe, but blame it on the ’50s and male bonding. (As I recall, in those days the kids who had BB guns were exactly the kids who shouldn’t have been allowed to have BB guns.)
How else can we self-soothe on Christmas? My extended family numbers about a dozen now. I would feel pure joy if all of us spent the afternoon in those matching flannel Christmas pajamas and nightgowns. Just picturing it makes me smile. Let goofiness “trump” chaos. The only thing better would be if we all went caroling in our jammies — with warm gloves and mugs filled with spiked hot chocolate.
Hang up Christmas lights, even if you live alone. I hang a string or two of white lights and I love to get up early and drink my coffee while looking out the window at the early morning darkness. (OK, I still watch Morning Joe, but that’s why I’m writing this column — to self-soothe.)
If you have access to one, set up one of those villages with lighted houses and churches and shops — you can even get a miniature leg lamp, although the one I got for our family village was the same size as one of the houses. Maybe that was the intention.
Christmas cookies are a double-edged sword. We have a family recipe from an aunt who just died, and they are the best in the world, as are the lace cookies made by the other grandmother, JJ. The first bite is heavenly. They are the perfect gift. Eating them is hugely stressful, however — it’s impossible to eat less than half-a-dozen — and baking them is out of the question for someone like me who avoids ovens at all costs.
Forget your fears of the Green Line or the Blue Line — both Harlem and Oak Park stations have escalators on the Green Line, so go downtown. The Neapolitan Creche at the Art Institute is really distinctive and only displayed once a year near the holidays, this year until Jan. 7. The River Walk, if it’s not too windy, is both soothing and interesting. Try not to admire the new high-rises along the river too much. The architecture is spectacular and will make you even more depressed about the designs of our new downtown high-rises.
Don’t hesitate to go to the movies alone. You’ll be surprised how many people are at the movies alone on holidays. It’s a great self-soother. Stay for two and have popcorn. The Lake has wonderful popcorn; now if they’d only serve wine.
I have absolutely no advice on either gifts or Christmas cards.
Finally, take a look at what little kids do to self-soothe and get yourself a nice, soft, cuddly teddy bear.
Apply generously.
