I am finding it painful and frightening to watch the growing divide among Democrats between those supporting President Biden’s candidacy and those calling for him to step down. His age and incidents of misspeaking or not having a ready response to a question have become the focus of increasing anxiety, culminating with the debate on June 27.
Rather than focus on Trump’s bullying and insulting the president, his evasion of moderators’ questions, and incoherent ranting, the spotlight landed on Biden’s moments of struggling for words. Who would not be thrown off by such an onslaught of lies and attacks?
Looking at the content of the debate, it was clear that Biden spoke facts and truth and prospects for a continuing progressive program in his next term, while Trump offered nothing but aggressive bluster. Who was the winner? The loser?
What is going on among Democrats now reminds me of the anxious reactivity of a family when they see a decline in an older generation family leader. There is a projection process which starts with just one or a few family members worrying about what will happen if this strong person, on whom the family depends, shows signs of frailty.
A smart family will be objective about the actual extent of the decline and not over-react while respectfully supporting the leader. The more anxious family will focus more on the deficits, putting the leader in the position of defending himself or herself. The process grows as more family members join in the anxious focus, further undermining the functioning of the leader.
Family systems scholar, Kathleen Kerr describes the projection process as operating automatically, out-of-awareness, and involving the entire family:
“The aim of the process is to dissipate anxiety in the system as a whole, not to decrease functioning in the person who is the object of the focus. This is a side effect of the process. With the best of intentions, a family can ‘do in’ its own and be deeply troubled by the end product of its own process.”
This looks like what is happening now on a societal level with an anxiety-driven splintering taking place among Democrats. Meanwhile, even as he is getting pressure to step down as the party’s candidate, President Biden just hosted a NATO summit at the White House, showing leadership based on knowledge of international affairs and years of experience in diplomatic, cooperative relationships between nations.
His ability to keep up a daunting schedule of travel and campaign events while also doing his job at the White House looks to me like he has the mileage needed physically and cognitively for another term. He has a heart for working people, a serious concern about climate change, and a proven devotion to public service. He heads a strong administration with Kamala Harris as vice president, a highly competent cabinet, department leaders and civil servants.
Should the unthinkable happen in November, I would see the current divide among Democrats as holding a large part of the responsibility. I agree with Ken Trainor who wrote in a recent Wednesday Journal column: We cannot afford to panic.
Stephanie Ferrera is a family therapist and partner in the Center for Family Consultation.