Five-Hour Energy High

It works a little better than a cup of coffee

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By David Hammond

At the National Restaurant Association show, I'd availed myself of a few sample products from several vendors. In the course of the day, I tried a bottle of Five-Hour Energy drink that was offered by a pleasant, chatty gal who had obviously been sampling her product throughout the day.

Like everyone else in the world, I'd seen this drink advertised on television and was more than a little dubious regarding the desirability of imbibing this medicinal-sounding liquid instead of a cup of coffee in the morning. My dubiety was increased when I read the label that assured me this beverage contained "caffeine comparable to a cup of the leading premium coffee."

The obvious question: why not just drink a cup of coffee? Especially in light of the fact that coffee will likely not induce, as the label warns, "a Niacin Flush."

Now, I've had Red Bull (drinkable) and I've had Monster (undrinkable), and this little shot of 5-HE had the advantage of being small and thus pretty easy to slam back. The taste was slightly bitter with a somewhat clumsy overlay of some sweetener (not sugar, as the stuff contains only 5 calories). But it was small, so any bad tastes were quickly gone and forgotten.

The good news: it pretty much works, and I'd say it works a little better than a cup of coffee. And by "works," I mean I drank the bottle about an hour ago, I've written about 1,500 words since then, and The Wife keeps telling me to please be quiet, as I guess I'm maybe talking more than I usually do, but I just feel good and it's not really that hard to talk, write food posts, watch television, listen to some music, and polish shoes at the same time, I mean, there's so much of the brain that isn't utilized, you know, and so why not take full advantage of all the capacity that god or nature or whatever gave us, you know, so I'm thinking, maybe I should just go out and buy a case of this stuff and keep it by my desk, I could get so much done, probably sleep less, get a lot of reading done, this stuff is probably be great when gearing up for a workout, and

 

Reader Comments

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Another Oak Park resident  

Posted: May 25th, 2012 5:26 PM

They brought out a new energy product recently and it contains amino acids which they claim give the same 5-hour kick, but I don't touch that "stuff". ...because I like coffee :)

Lisa Miller Browdy from Oak Park, Illinois  

Posted: May 24th, 2012 5:50 PM

Coffee has some antioxidants and arguable health benefits. I don't know what the heck is in that product. Is there an ingredient list? Thanks for the post, it was a hoot!

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