The Sad Diminution of MAY Day

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By John Hubbuch

In 1967 I was a senior in high school taking a one semester course titled American Problems. (I'm pretty sure that today the country has enough problems to make it a full year course.) Mr. Hall taught the course that included a unit on Communism. He had us read from Das Kapital and The Manifesto. In the class debates I took the pro Communist side thereby earning the wrath of some of my Hoosier classmates. I found that I much enjoyed  stirring up the sleeping masses. I welcomed the contrarian label. I even bought into the classless society and worker's overthrowing the capitalist pigs---until of course  when I became a capitalistic pig lawyer.                 

But to this day I have a soft spot for Communism as a philosophy even though it is utterly inconsistent with human nature. The Wall was knocked down. Cuba is a 1950's movie set. China is out capitalizing us for Mao's sake! I used to love cheering for our Olympic boxers to knock the crap out of the Commies every 4 years.  Our black guys were a lot faster than their white guys. USA! USA! Now the USSR is all chopped up and it's not the same.  Russian gangsters and American hedge fung managers drink fancy champagne at the same exclusive clubs. What a world.                                                  

And  it is a good thing to be rid of Stalin and Mao who along with Hitler are  templates for the evil that men do. That part of Communism is not so nostalgic. And the Cuban missle crisis  was as scary as it gets. 

So i guess I will have to take a pass on firing back a shot of vodka in celebration of May Day, the quintessential Communist holiday. Workers of the world you have nothing to lose but your chains!  And your collective bargaining rights.                                        


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